I know I stopped blogging here for a little while. Thank-you all for your love and concern.
Mrs. June is a blessing as a woman of God with the true heart of a servant. Even while she has retired, she makes time to call at just the right time and gives insight that no one else can give. Thank you- thank you for your amazing spirit and unconditional love.
I’m dealing with some personal things. I know that I couldn’t persuade my feelings to be different or convincing with all the emotions I am having, so I took a break to renew and refresh giving a lot of inward reflection of what I need and should be projecting to God and everyone I come in contact with. My emotions are raw and very much on the surface. It is hard to not expose them. I am at a transition time of my life. Surrender is a struggle for me and I try to get back in control of things and realize that it is beyond my feeble control. When I read scripture, I give it a lot of thought and try to think of how it is real to me. I know that the word is there and each time I pick it up, there is a message that is specifically for me.
Today I had a singular feeling and by that I mean I feel singular.
It is a strange feeling to be completely alone. I know I am not completely alone. I have read a few books on the life of monks and mystics and how they pursue a singular life.
It is not a singular life that excludes God , but quite the opposite, it is a life that only includes God. I’m not saying that social interaction with others is excluded, it is just not as necessary. I don’t know if I am the person who craves solitude or craves the company of others. I know at times it is a little of both. I am ok to be alone, and I am ok to be with others. I struggle with where God wants me to be. I need a clear signal, and right now I don’t have it. I am a little lost when it comes to having a clear picture of where God wants me to be and what He wants for me. It is not easy when there are a lot of inner struggles going on. I am vulnerable. I don’t have a clear direction of where I am heading.
Today’s verse: LIVE LIFE
“ God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.”
I need to embrace this time God has given me. It is hard. I am struggling. I am not free from sin. I’ve taken a wrong turn- not in a devastating way, but in my emotional journey.
Romans 1:16 “The just shall live by faith”
God reminded me that every life is useful. Even yours.
I feel that God will reveal what he wants for me when he feels it is the appropriate time.
I need to surrender and give God glory. Today I would like to thank God for letting me see that there are a lot of areas that he and I are at work with in my life. From all these challenges that I am facing, it is my prayer that He will be with me, provide a guiding hand and lead me in the way that I am to go. I do get to live my life. I am not dead. God still has some special use for me, and will let me know what that is in His time.
Thanking God for his Grace and love.